Since I Can't Afford Actual Therapy

This blog has been a therapeutic addition to my life.  It has given me an outlet to work out any frustration I have with my marriage, our dogs or work or whatever comes up but recently I’ve noticed I’ve really been censoring myself.  I suppose when I sit down to write and can’t come up with anything lighthearted to say I decide not to post.  And it’s really starting to bother me; Hubs and I have done tons of fun stuff and I wish I could muster up some enthusiasm to write about it.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not actually complaining about my life---my life is actually pretty great, it’s just that the yucky day to day details have been wearing on me in a way that makes me want to throw in the towel...So, in this moment I am going to list a handful of items that are desperately (and successfully I might add) trying to steal the thunder away from all the fun/funny stuff and hopefully we can get back to normal.

• No matter how I calculate our finances, Team Carter can shoot a monthly budget to hell in the matter of moments.  I need to learn to say no.


• I wish my family wouldn’t always blame Hubs for our impending (and by impending I mean months and months and months away) move to Lee’s Summit.  I found the neighborhood.  We picked the house.  And Hubs is in no way, shape, or form trying to pull me away from my family.


• Hubs will say yes to anything—taking the bathroom trash out on trash day, being on time, cleaning the garage, taking the bike rack off the truck, getting his paperwork together to get paid on contracting work, working out after work, following up on misc life issues, and ect ect ect but I still have to nag the crap out him to get results.  I’ve joked around about having him sign a piece of paper every time he says yes, but it’s really starting to wear on me.


• My job has set some ridiculous goals for me (and all the other sales people) that make it hard to believe for one minute those particular numbers are attainable.


• I'm missing my friends.  When I was single they were my lifeline to the world and now I'm starting to notice a major dip in friend time.   I feel like I barely see them.  I can only imagine how much worse its gonna get after we have kids


• Operation 20lbs (aka “Operation:  20lbs Might Have Been A Little Overzealous Buuuut My Clothes Are Fitting So Much Better) is going slow.  And by slow I mean, I’m going to need the rest of the winter to actually lose 20 lbs.  It so frustrating.

Don’t get me wrong, I know there are REAL problems out in the world: hunger, homelessness, work place violence, ozone alerts but somehow in my life these seem like real daily problems that build up and build up and build up until all I want to do is scream and so, I just say nothing.

So, since I can't afford actual therapy, I'm going to start writing about my actual life.  The good, the bad, and the ridiculous.  And while I have no idea where it’s going to go, I’m hoping there will be more good/ridiculous than the yucky posts.